Is fear keeping you stuck? Here are 4 questions to ask yourself

Fear in the spiritual sense is the absence of love.  In everyday life, it looks like this…

“I need to make enough money in case something happens.”

                                      Or

“I have to go to that conference, or I won’t meet any new clients.”

                                      Or

“If I ask for time off, they’ll think I’m lazy and not working hard enough.”

                                      Or

“If I don’t go to that party, they’ll judge me and won’t invite me next time.”

These are just some of the everyday thoughts and stories we tell ourselves that ultimately create a belief that tells us we HAVE to do something which in most cases goes against what we actually want to do.  We create a narrative, worrying about something that hasn’t even happened and thinking about what others will think of you before you even take action.

I’ve had my own share of fear and still do to this day, but I’ve learned to recognize it, understand where it stems from and still choose to act on the smallest of decisions to some of the most important ones in my life.

I’ve spoken about fear before because I believe so strongly that so many of us can benefit from understanding that everything we actually want is on the other side of that fear.  The biggest opportunity you have is understanding where it comes from so when/if it comes up again, you can move past it with greater ease.

A fear-based mentality inevitably finds its way in all areas of our lives and unfortunately can stop us in our tracks from taking inspired action or any action at all to something we want to do!

If you can find that place where when you know you’re being crippled by a fear-based thought, take a step back and ask yourself:

  • How do I feel about this thought?
  • What is this feeling trying to tell me?
  • Where is this thought coming from?
  • What are the thoughts and feelings that will serve me moving forward?

Remember, your fears don’t always come in the major moments or milestones in your life, they can also creep in the smallest most insignificant of experiences!  The key is to be aware of them so you can face them and move past them.

Let me know what you think, what are your thoughts? Leave a comment below.

Where has fear impacted your daily life?

Have you been able to recognize a fear you had and still move forward?

Thanks for stopping by and remember, you’re stronger than your fears, more courageous than you think and braver than you know!

Lisa xo

How YOU can use a change in your organization to your advantage

How many of you have been part of an organization where you were impacted by some kind of change?  I can see most of us raising our hand.  Whether it’s leadership changes, structural changes, changes in policies, etc.

When you’re part of a small organization, you often feel those changes much more than if you were working for a global organization with a large employee base.  While you may not be able to use every change that takes place to your advantage, there ARE opportunities that can arise from some of those changes if you choose to act on them.

The idea here is, as an employee, learning opportunities come in ALL different ways and finding what that is in your current circumstances is a choice you always have.  How you respond to those changes is up to you.

In my experience, I’ve often seen a lack of manpower (one of many resources that are often needed) be a common challenge come up in organizations.  So, what can that mean for you in your organization?

  • Can you create a new position?
  • Can you learn a new skill and apply it to your role?
  • Can you distribute the work that needs to get done amongst your colleagues/peers?
  • Is the work that ‘needs’ to get done REALLY important or can you dissolve it?
  • Can you automate it?

Think outside the box and consider where and what the opportunity can mean for YOU as the employee.  Changes within an organization doesn’t always mean you need to run for the hills, however, if you do want to stay, consider how you can use the changes to your advantage.

Don’t be afraid to have an open, transparent conversation with your manager and/or leadership team and propose your ideas.

Leaders – don’t be afraid to take note and HEAR your employee’s out when they’re coming to you with ideas and recommendations.  Part of going through any change is including and considering your people in that change.

If you’re going through any changes right now in your organization, what will you propose that can not only help the organization, but help YOU learn something new?

Keep an open mind – learning opportunities come in all shapes and sizes – the best ones are also those that YOU can create! 😉

All my appreciation,

Lisa ❤

Do you struggle with making a decision?

How many of you have struggled with making a decision?  I’m not talking about the simple ones like, what to make for dinner or where to go to eat with your loved one, although I know the “what do you feel like eating tonight?” decision can often take up the entire evening to decide. 😊  I’m referring to the really important decisions.  Making a career change.  Health-related decisions.  Quitting your job.  Selling your house and moving, etc.

More often than not, when we’re not clear about who we are and how that aligns to our values, it’s easy to rely on outside sources to help with making a decision.  Now, I’m not saying you should never consider outside sources to help you with reaching a decision.  In fact, I encourage it when you’ve reached a point when you know something needs to change and need help in considering all the factors that will help you in reaching a decision.

But when you’ve allowed too many outside sources consume your thoughts where it clouds your judgment and influences how YOU feel about the direction you should go in, then something’s off.

When we’re relying on outside sources instead of our own voice within, we can often find ourselves making decisions that are not in alignment with what’s right for us.

So, how do you learn to get more comfortable with listening to your OWN voice when making an important decision?

A couple of questions that I often reflect on which have been helpful when I need to reach a decision are the following:

  • How does this decision FEEL?

Many times, the idea of making a change can foster feelings of fear (Fear of the unknown, fear of not liking it, fear of making the wrong choice, fear of disappointing someone, etc. etc.)  But fear can also be confused with excitement and those good nervous like feelings.  Decipher between the two and listen to the feelings that come up for you.

  • What’s the impact of making this decision and who outside of myself does it affect?

If you have children and a significant other, then obviously you need to consider how this will impact them.  If not and it’s just yourself, how will YOU be impacted by this decision? 

  • What’s the cost of NOT making this decision?

Growth is not meant to be comfortable.  Change is the only thing that is constant.  Discomfort arises when we’re being pushed outside of our comfort zones; sometimes directly and indirectly.  What would happen if you did nothing at all?

  • What’s the worst-case scenario?

Will there be a significant financial impact?  Is there a sacrifice you have to make in order to follow through on this decision?  What else could come up?

  • Does making this decision get me closer to WHO I want to be?

We’re always striving to be better than yesterday.  How does this decision help you get closer to who you want to be, or more importantly who you need to be for where you want to go in your life?

  • What will I have learned from this experience if it’s NOT the right decision for me?

Sometimes even when we feel we have all the information at our hands, with the best of intentions, we realize after the fact it wasn’t the best decision.  IT’S OK.  It happens.  You’re human and you’ll survive.  What can you learn from the experience and more importantly, what did you learn about yourself?

Some of these questions may seem deep or even complex however, they can serve as a start for you to consider some of the questions to ask yourself.  If there are other questions that you come up with that you would add, please feel free to do so!

The idea is you want to get comfortable with listening to your own voice, so that even with all the information you may have gathered, you feel confident in making a decision that aligns to what’s best for you.

Now here’s another question I have for you.

What are some effective methods you use when you have to make an important decision?

Remember, your thoughts can help someone who just might need to hear a fresh perspective. Don’t be shy and thanks so much for stopping by! ❤

With so much love,

Lisa

Give yourself the gift to BE Present

Photo by Lisa De Nicola

Welcome back!  To a new year, a new start and 365 days ahead of you to DO whatever it is your heart ❤ desires.

Coming back from a relaxed holiday with lots of time for rest, sleep (LOTS of sleep), family time, filling my belly (and soul) with love and yummy treats.  I’m looking forward to getting back into the swing of things.  The return to work after the Christmas holidays can sometimes be overwhelming as many of us are often being greeted by an avalanche of work that is just waiting to get done. 

There’s a sense of urgency to get things started, to gain some momentum having been off and business dormant for a few weeks.  To get some traction on projects that might have been set aside to get done or started on in the new year.  Not to mention, re-adjusting back to your weekday work routine of early mornings, preparing for your commute ahead (mentally and emotionally), early nights and let’s not forget your diet.  Gone are the holiday treats and magically you’re back to morning smoothies, soups and salads for lunch, etc.  😉

So how do you ensure a great start to the year without losing yourself in the hustle and bustle of routine? 

BE PRESENT.

Being present allows us to BE in the moment.  It helps us stay connected in the task at hand, the person we’re having a conversation with, or the meeting we’re trying to participate in, etc.  It also allows us to remain grounded and puts us in a relaxed state.  Particularly if you’re one who easily gets anxious by constantly projecting to the future or playing into the distractions that surround us all.  Just like maintaining balance in your day to day has its benefits, being present is equally just as important.  You can easily notice some of the benefits listed above once put into practice.


Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

Believe me, I recognize the number of distractions we’re surrounded by.  Including those convenient devices we all walk around with 24/7, which can seem impossible to let go of all the time.  But the beauty that detaching and being in the moment in just the smallest of ways can offer us, is priceless.

In a world where we’re constantly planning for our futures or worrying about what happened yesterday, it’s no wonder we can’t appreciate the present moment for what it is!  The truth is, you’ll never have that same moment again if you’re too busy focused on the next thing to do.  What time you have to go to the gym, or that you have that appointment you need to make before you forget, etc. etc. etc.

I try my best to put this into practice every day, whether I’m by myself or with people and while it’s a work in progress, the benefits I can confidently say make a difference.  Not just for me, but the people I’m with as well.

Start with baby steps that can help shift your behavior.

Put your phone away when going to a business meeting or meeting a friend for coffee.  Not on the table face down – AWAY.

Take notice of your breathing and the way you feel whether you’re alone or with people.

If you have a nagging or recurring thought, notice it and let it pass.  Re-focus your attention to what you’re doing.  Writing down your thoughts or journaling before starting your day can help let go of any thoughts you might have and clear your head if you have a busy mind.

If you have someone in your life who is FABULOUS at being present – take notice of them!  Being around others who are equally present can make it easier to learn from and adopt simple practices.

Take notice of your surroundings.  Even if you go to the same coffee shop, ride the same bus or train everyday to work.  Try doing so without music in your ears, reading your book or scrolling through Instagram.  Try just sitting there without having to do something.

Again, baby steps to shift behavior.  It’s about progress, not perfection.  Give yourself the gift of BEING present and take joy in the benefits.

As always, I’d love to hear from you and please don’t be shy to share your thoughts!

What are some ways that help you BE present?

Thank you SO MUCH for starting 2019 with me!  I’m looking forward to the year ahead and what’s to come.  Thank YOU again for allowing me to fill your inbox each week, your time, attention, and energy. 🙏

With so much heart ❤ , 

Lisa xo

Got a plan? Great – now forget about it! 💯

Have you ever felt like you wanted to explore, take an adventure, use your time however you wanted to without having a plan and just… go with the flow?

Last week I was traveling on business and knew that my week would be hi-jacked with a 3-day meeting with no time to do anything but talk about – well business.  Numbers YTD (year to date), account developments, what we were trending for end of year objectives and discuss what are some initial thoughts were for 2019.  ✍

What that meant was this was another week of heads down, working away, planning how every minute, hour and day was being spent to cram everything in.  How often do you feel you need to plan for every moment, every work day, every weekend?  I know you’re used to planning as much as I am – we all do for the most part and believe me, I LOVE a good plan in my business and in my personal life.  It’s a part of life, it helps keep us on track and ensuring we’re working towards our goals and completely natural.

Continue reading “Got a plan? Great – now forget about it! 💯”

Playing it safe? How lack of creativity & fear are holding you back! ?

Do you ever feel like there’s only ONE way to do something?  Does confidence and fear get in the way of your ability to be creative and move forward?

This past weekend, I happened to get caught up with a friend and our catch up led to a rich conversation on playing it safe, fear, confidence and timing to name just a few of the things we touched on.

We started off catching up on our respective Euro trips that we both took separately at the end of the summer, exchanging stories and laughs and sharing our most memorable moments.  We then switched gears to talking about our realities and she shared she was on a quest to figuring out what to do next in her job.

She’s spent a considerable amount of her career with one company where she’s progressed but had reached a plateau and was feeling like she was consistently getting overlooked for promotions.  She was ready to get to the next level and was feeling like not only was she being looked over, but she wasn’t provided a clear path on what she needed to do to get there and time was ticking.  At this point, her confidence has begun to be affected, self-worth, and her own capabilities were just some of the things she started to doubt within herself.

Continue reading “Playing it safe? How lack of creativity & fear are holding you back! ?”

Have you ever been in the transition stage?

Ok, this one is a little longer than some of my other posts so I hope you’ll stick around long enough to read to the end as it’s got some helpful insights that I hope you’ll find helpful.  If it doesn’t apply to you today, maybe someone in your life can benefit, so please share it with them.

You’ve been laid off.  You’ve spent 10 + years with your employer, given them your all, dedicated your time and energy to achieving a common goal and find yourself shocked and an emotional mess.

Continue reading “Have you ever been in the transition stage?”

There is no work/life balance – there’s just balance

I think every company and every one of us can relate to the idea of work/life balance. Companies promote how important work/life balance is for their organization, and many of us want to understand what this looks like when engaged in a job search and evaluating potential employers.

Everyone seems to have a perspective on how this should look and I’ve been asked this question plenty of times in my career.  But one thing I do believe is we can all relate to trying to strike a balance no matter where you are in your life and what company you work for.

Continue reading “There is no work/life balance – there’s just balance”

Have you figured this out yet?

At what point do we learn or KNOW who we are, and get it ‘right’ by aligning ourselves with the right job?   What about aligning ourselves with the right company, working with the right people and doing meaningful work?

For me, this was something that I was hunting and searching for the longest time.  I got out of school with my degree in HR and was determined to get a job that aligned to my degree.  From there, I figured I would just continue to grow in my job, learn new skills, figure out with experience what I liked, what I didn’t like, etc.   All the while, not even questioning that maybe I was just going through the motions and doing things that I didn’t necessarily think I should be doing, but more that I knew how to do, I learned to do and I would grow to enjoy.

Continue reading “Have you figured this out yet?”